Category: Soul-of-Thought Revival
Journal: *VOICE* ("unthought-like thoughts that are the souls of thought")
Dates: 7-18-05 and 9-8-10
waiting womb
7-18-05
you can wander around lost and searching for something to find you, to make you know yourself for certain...you can do that, wandering forever.
and you can search outside yourself hoping to find it in the vast but limited world of reality, because the world inside you is unlimited confusion and you can't seem to find yourself there.
and even when the advice you hear outside tells you to look inside, you don't know where to begin to look.
you know it's been inside you all along, what you're looking for, it's been there waiting for you.
once you find it, or it finds you as it was in my case, your once hazy vision of a world with blurred edges and transitory images comes *SMACK* into focus...and everything is so clear now. everything makes sense, even nonsense. you find a purpose, you find a reason, you find a world you always wished you had but thought it was too far away from where you were...you find yourself. and you know yourself better than you could possibly imagine. better than you could ever explain. and you laugh, remembering how different you were before you knew...how opposite a world was in your view. and you cry, thinking this is the beginning of life, knowing the world before was a womb for the waiting.
Co-creating a World of Love
9-8-10
We are magnets for the experiences we need to heal us into wholeness. Look into the people in your life. Those common experiences and frustrations that bonded you in friendship, love, and understanding...they are a reflection of your own healing path, just as yours is a reflection of theirs. Even the people who irritate but you can't leave them for one reason or another...they, too, represent lessons to learn. And they are learning that same lesson.
The circumstances you find yourself in are always the right ones. Even when you feel the sting of being in the wrong place at the wrong time, or the torture of making bad decisions that lead you to bad results...you were meant to find yourself there.
But these outside forces are not what define who we are.
Inside everyone is a battle between fear and love. It really boils down to that, trite as it may sound. Neither can live with the other, and each is overshadowing the other in any given circumstance.
When you act out of fear, you are not yourself...you are what you know you should discard. And guilt seeps in, then, because you know...and everything else that distances ourselves from the source of our strength begins to snowball into an avalanche. And there you are, buried and frozen until love comes again to the rescue...if you let it.
When you act out of love, you are yourself...even if it feels unfamiliar. And just as fear creates fear, love creates love. With love, however, you expand rather than contract. You grow. You learn. You love more. And you inspire others to look with eyes of love. And they grow. They learn. They love more. And they inspire others.
If fear and love were both wildfires...which would you rather watch run rampant in the world? The one that burns and destroys...or the one that purifies and restores?
